THE NEED TO BE BY MYSELF

 Prayer necessitates solitude, often abhorred because it is confused with loneliness. The latter entails an unsought alienation whose hallmark is desolation. As Edgar affirms, “Who alone suffers suffers most” (William Shakespeare, King Lear, VI). 

The need to be by myself pertains to a feeling of wellbeing: as Scipio points out, ‘one is never less alone than when alone’ (Nunquam minus solus quam cum solus). Growing older, this desired richness is strengthened, like aged wine.

Solitude enriches prayer because its stillness highlights an intimate prayerful dialogue even when outwardly engaged. Our hearts’ cultivated stillness enriches our doings by focusing on their significance, so Mary, rather than Martha, addresses our understanding (Luke 10, 38-42).  This insight is furthered strengthened by the Evangelist’s observation concerning Mary, who “treasured up all these things, pondering them in her heart” (Luke 2,19).

The need to contemplate the Beautiful is itself expressive of, “Be still, and know that I am God” (Psalm 46,10). As Plato points out, ‘The contemplation of beauty causes the soul to grow wings’  (Symposium 210a-212a), which identifies with truth and the ability to harmonise our sensory experiences with our ethical and intellectual aspirations addressed by faith: our encounter with the Magister, which inevitably invites us to be contemplative in our doings. In other words, to stop and reflect: a chance to pause and acknowledge my choices and understand how they address my discipleship. 

We need to confront our doings with the Magister and enrich ourselves with his insights: ‘The apostles gathered around Jesus and reported to him all they had done and taught’ (Mark 6,30). We do not do this alone, but as members of a faith community because ‘where two or three gather in my name, there I am with them’ (Matthew 18,20).

The need to be by myself is not an excuse to isolate myself: it serves me to purify my heart of excessive noises separating me from God in the Magister's footsteps, who "very early in the morning, while it was still dark, got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed" (Mark 1,35). We can do this because "God gave us a Spirit, which does not make us timid, but gives us power, love, and self-discipline" (2 Timothy 1,7). 


Martin


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