Steps to Discipleship

 Caught up in our routines and aspirations, like fish convinced that their bowl is an ocean, we are confined by our shadows unable to confront our fears. Not experiencing the light of the Resurrection, we can only dream of having done so.  Sometimes, like the prodigal son (Luke 15,11-32), we need to experience what it means to reach rock bottom before we can understand, because Golgotha precedes the empty tomb: Mary Magdalene’s love defines the difference (John 20,1-18). Ignoring this love, some think they are immune and persist in their delusions. Despite hearing his voice, they fail to recognise their ‘ Rabboni ’: fear constrains them; bolted doors highlight their anxious apprehensions (John 20,19).   This anxiety is a repeated experience that needs exploring if one intends discipleship. Ignoring it is more common but dreams can become nightmares once the sun awakens from its sleepiness. Some pretend otherwise: like whirling dogs trying to catch their tails, they i...

Eastertide  concerns brokenness, which characterises the story of the Samaritan woman (John 4,1-26): it asks us to consider that “ the Lord is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit ” (Psalm 34,18). This realisation permits us to live our conversion because, quoting Saint Augustine, “ In my deepest wound I saw your glory and it dazzled me ”.    Lent allowed us to consider the emptiness that accompanies those seeking fulfilment in empty relationships – she had multiple relationships (John 4,16-18) and satisfaction in the wrong places: in the possibility of not having to come to the well.  ‘ Comfort sought? ’ Partly, because she came to the well alone and at noon, avoiding others either due to shame or rejection: an outcast in her community (John 4,6-7)?  Not ignoring her, we are similar: at times, we are shamed by our attitudes or choices, other times we are ostracised for no apparent reason. These experiences can break or make us, ...

Preaching Christ does not necessarily entail living Him: human words, independently of their good intentions, can never fill this void.  Our words are often a barrier to ‘ hearing ’ (Deuteronomy 6,4) God and our hearts: deafening, they neither enhance us nor grace those who hear them.  Hence,  Paul’s advice: “ Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what helps build others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen “ (Ephesians 4,29).  Focused on ourselves, we silence consciences by superfluous words, intended to hide our shortcomings. Roaming in circles, we ignore the cross and its power: “ when I am lifted from the earth, I will draw all people to myself ” (John 12,32).  Undermin ing its power, we are stuck, unable to reconcile our affirmations with our choices. We overlook that although pure and blameless, “ God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God ” ...

     Following the sorrowful mother this Friday, we realise that our steps matter: our need to adapt them in a harmonious procession. Failing, disharmony distances us from others.  Repentance expresses our search for harmony. It integrates an intimate ' I-Thou ' relationship lived out within the us of the faith community. It is, thus, unfortunate when we emphasise the message and ignore the Messenger because disharmony results.  Rather than an ethical understanding, the heart's conversion is focused on intimacy with Christ through others. The result is a heart enlightened by His presence as the foundation stone when we speak of faith's transmission in terms of words and deeds ( Catechism of the Catholic Church, 2472).    Our attitude towards others is integral to our witnessing. This raises a question: ' Is meekness of heart something sought and practised ' (Matthew 11,29)? If so, then Pope John XXIII's intuition proves helpful: to see everything, over...

Like Stephen Daedalus (James Joyce, Ulysses ), we take refuge in big fearful words: big words that speak of generosity, peace, or justice and make us so unhappy as we realise that presumption underlines them. Hence, “ the goal of our instruction is love from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith ” (1 Timothy 1,5). Challenging, because it reminds us of the need to listen to our hearts.  Listening is a learning experience that isn’t easy to realise, and yet, it enlightens what we mean by prayer. Superfluous words hinder the Spirit’s stirrings within our hearts and mute conscience’s challenging gaze, sealing its irrelevancy as our babbling muffles our hearts’ joyfulness.  Words prove hollow unless they reflect a ‘ renewed ’ heart focused on the Magister through repentance. Lacking this renewal, a void intervenes and suffocates our joyfulness. Emptiness! And yet, joyfulness signs our path as indicated by the Magister: “ I have told you this so that my joy may be i...

 Claiming discipleship, we need to constantly measure our claim: the ratio of our willingness to embrace ‘ committed love ’ (Agape) and implement it as a fundamental value within our lives. Its integration enhances our self-understanding as we meet the Magister through our choices.  So doing, we need to consider our environment, be it physical, emotional or spiritual, because it either enhances or else hinders our coming after the Magister. What dominates many of us is – and this brings into perspective Huxley’s insight ( Brave New World )  – a cosmic order focused on the ‘ me, myself and I ’ now subjected to an irresistible invasive technology that doesn’t necessarily enrich us.  Some suggest that we are but an extension of this mechanism: an affirmation that underlines Orwell’s opus (George Orwell, Nineteen Eighty-Four ). The automation of the human person sustains a misreading: a fading dignity confounding our self-understanding.  Social media upholds this mi...

As Seneca observes,  the language of truth is simple  (Veritatis simplex oratio est), and yet, it is not easy to communicate the truth unless one intends it. Truth can be intuitive, but when ignored or downplayed, it judges, sometimes accusing: nowhere is this more apparent than when fakeness defines our discipleship.  Coming after Christ teaches us that ‘ Veritas et rosae habent spinas ’ – truth and roses have thorns : it entails a need to craft a listening radical heart because, as Pope Benedict XVI reminds us, we were made for greatness, not to be deceived by comfort sought or offered.   This reminds me of a passage that initially proves baffling: “ And if your eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life with one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into the fire of hell ” (Matthew 18,9).  Being snared by the eye is a familiar story because just as “ Death and destruction are never satisfied, neither a...

A desired intimacy, focused on the Magister as the source of our love, enriches friendship: if wanting, it is best to enclose your heart in silence until enlightened by love, rather than by desire.  The hurt we cause those we love pains our heart when our silence is interpreted as abandonment or worse, betrayal.   Friendship encourages growth and independence, rather than decline and dependence.  While affirming that love has no limits, it must not be forgotten that the course of true love is stony:  one example concerns the friendship between David and Jonathan (1 Samuel 18,1-2 Samuel 21,13). Saint Jerome points out that a friendship that can cease has never been real: a wounding experience that perpetuates untruthfulness and thus conditions the possibility of friendship.  Stumped, we harden our hearts: we incarcerate ourselves in darkness, because true friendship matters. Sometimes, we have to let go because some are meant to be part of our journey, not t...

Aloneness increasingly characterises our society as mental health issues impact us silently. Despite the invasive social media, isolation is reinforced. Love at first sight! Manipulating one night stands. Emptiness! ‘ L’Éstranger ’ enlightens: strangers roaming in a meaningless silence.  Debussy’s observation: ‘ music is the silence between the notes ’ helps me appreciate my search for togetherness: some call it solidarity, because we are not born for ourselves only.  Exploring the silence uniting us: a streaming fellowship. Sacred steps!  Working through my emptiness: the empty tomb is the modus operandi addressing my choices. Magdalene enlightens bolted doors (John 20,11-18). Outstripping my fears, imposed confinements are surpassed: “ God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control ” (2 Timothy 1,7). Gratefulness!  It challenges me to become fragile for the sake of others. Weakness is not envisaged. Instead, a replacing willingness to follo...

The year’s yearnings accompany, sometimes devouring, leaving us breathless. We need rest! Similar to the Shabbat, Lent offers us a space in time to be real by resting from what we do, which often summarises our self-understanding.  Lent can help us to understand the patterns that underpin much of our doing. And as we understand, like Saint Mary of Egypt, encountering the Cross, we discover our freedom.  Most of us are neither cold nor hot: “ I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So because you are lukewarm – neither hot nor cold – I am about to spit you out of my mouth ” (Revelation 3,15). The price we pay for being lukewarm is that we become indifferent, ignoring ourselves. Fear dominates! Like the Laodiceans, to whom the passage is addressed, we fail to make a difference in the world by being a light (Matthew 5,14), because we have lost our saltiness (Matthew 5,13), replacing it with feeling snug, soothing in our unhea...

There was a time, not so distant, when philosophy was discouraged and theology was excluded from our university. Some insisted that an education enlightened by the Classics is wasteful! Not thinking critically is advantageous to  ‘ Big Brother ’ seeking to impress us with a fallacious salvific presence. This is part of our story: we cannot ignore its impact, but this does not mean that we have learned from it. The Classics offer insights unavailable to those unlucky enough to ignore them. For example, ‘ hubris ’ (hybris) speaks of a personality undermined by excessive overconfidence. Hubris proves a frequent theme in Greek mythology, often portrayed as a hero’s fatal flaw that leads to disaster. ‘ Icarus ’ is one example. Attempting to escape from Crete, his father, ‘ Daedalus ’, made him wings made of feathers and wax. Despite being warned by his father, Icarus flew too close to the sun: his waxed wings melted and tumbling into the sea, he drowned.  Self-importance undermines...

I find myself roaming in one of these trendy shopping centres replacing our village squares, where individuals were once conscious of being part of a greater whole. People rush dreamily here and there, preoccupied with themselves but little else besides. Limnos emerges: the dream island where Hypnos had his cave, poppies decorating its entrance. Watered by Lethe, the river of forgetfulness, day and night are indistinguishable. His brother Thanatos (Death) watches on as their parents, Nyx (Night) and Erebus (Darkness), extend their shadowy presence.  Emporiums, carols trumpet, but the king is ignored as images of Christmas Father replace him. Solitary, moving statues, lacking dialogue, ignore each other because the latter presumes an existing relationship, surpassing one-night stands. Every relationship aspiring to intimacy is contemplative, which exhibits a willingness to listen. This envisaged silentium is expressive of ‘ committed love ’ (Agape), which, having surpassed the fear ...

Nothing should be presumed: neither that our hearts are immune from envy nor that talking of faith is necessarily indicative of faithfulness. Sometimes, envy permeates the heart even if concealed in a mirage intended to convince others that we mean well: “ Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves ” (Matthew 7,15). Unfortunately, neither clerics nor religious are immune.  Envy is dangerous if ignored, more so when denied. A Spanish proverb affirms, “ Envy bites but never eats, that is why it always insists ”. Its insistence is a recipe for restlessness: the lack of peace within the heart, indicative of the Magister’s absence.  It contradicts discipleship because ‘ committed love ’ (Agape) “ is patient, love is kind: it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud ”(1 Corinthians 13,4). It is, therefore, futile that we tolerate it, since “ envy makes the bones rot ” (Proverb 14,30). Thus, Moses did not rebuke Eldad and M...

Liturgically speaking, we have entered the ‘ Ordinary Time ’: some thirty weeks intended as preparatory to celebrating those special moments known as Advent and Lent. I usually begin this time with a five-day silent retreat focused on listening to God’s word, intended to recharge my batteries through intimate dialogue.  One accompanying fundamental insight into our liturgy is that each season provides me with something special: a discernment of who I am in God’s eyes. A question accompanies: “ Am I ready to deepen this sagacity? ” Answering this question, I realise that sometimes I lack the necessary attention to appreciate, let alone live, these insights. Silence helps me to order my priorities: not to let tiredness overwhelm me or think that somehow I am better than others, no longer in need of redemption. Being less (Minorem) is a key to this self-understanding.  Comforted by silence, I reconsider the significance of being less: a bridge that unifies, rather than a pier lea...

How often have I heard the Gospel proclaim, “ Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me ”(Matthew 16,24)! Three questions accompany this affirmation: (i). “ What does ‘deny myself’ imply ”? (ii). “ What does the reference to the cross mean ”? (iii). “ Why are these qualities specified as conditions to discipleship ”? These questions increasingly preoccupy me because, approaching the fortieth anniversary of my ordination, like a good accountant, I need to add up my ‘ numbers ’ and discover the results: numbers do not lie. Wisdom demands self-criticism because “ the unexamined life is not worth living ” (Plato, Apology, 38a5-6). Thinking, examining my life, another Gospel passage draws my attention: “ Make every effort to enter through the narrow door, because many, I tell you, will try to enter and will not be able to ” (Luke 13,24). The narrow door identifies with the cross because, as noted, it specifies the willingness to follow the Ma...

Nothing stands in the way, but we must not presume that the mere imposition of our will edifies our self-understanding of discipleship: being blind doesn’t mean I can see. Discipleship is an invitation to embrace the Magister’s ‘ self-emptying ’ (Kenosis), which necessarily involves a deeper understanding of the cross as a gateway to deeper insights. Ignoring or attempting to replace it merely muddles things, especially if conceit accompanies us. Ignoring the cross, tradition’s triviality highlights our presumptions and consolidates childishness by downplaying childlikeness. In Nietzsche’s footsteps, often misunderstood and misused, childlikeness identifies with self-transformation guided by the principle that we relate not to what lies deep within us, but beyond us.  Childishness not only accompanies us; sometimes, it defines us. The need to self-overcoming, integral to being childlike, is, therefore, necessary. It is, thus, no wonder that Paul invites us to distinguish between th...

It is inescapable, unless one is deaf not to hear. This is not necessarily advantageous: sometimes, it proves expedient to be deaf and be spared the wasteful chattering increasingly consolidated by social media. Exposed to man’s unceasing babbling, it is easily assumed that “ humanity must perforce prey on itself, like monsters of the deep. ”(William Shakespeare, King Lear , IV.2) Things were not always so, but sometimes things change unnoticed: by the time we notice, it is too late to do anything about it.  Musing on past times that recall my childhood and beyond, it is striking how much noise has advanced its cause! Softly imposed ‘ music ’, though sometimes not so softly; its invasive presence is felt everywhere. A disturbing presence that reminds us of Orwell’s insight: “ You will be hollow. We shall squeeze you empty, and then we shall fill you with ourselves ” (George Orwell, 1984 ).   Like Fama in Ovid’s opus, whose domus contains a chaotic cosmos where words repla...

Judging others obscures my self-understanding. Consequently, though not easily admitted, it undermines my discipleship because, “ with the measure you use, it will be measured for you ” (Matthew 7,2). My negative evaluations of others serve to justify my idiocy: a way to hide myself from myself, forgetful that “ if the blind lead the blind, both will fall into a pit ” (Matthew 15,14). We need to take to heart this affirmation: “ Every plant that my heavenly Father has not planted will be pulled up by its roots ” (Matthew 15,13). Cicero’s “ Fortis est non pertubaris in rebus asperis ” (Show strength by keeping to the right path), enlightens our paths. Establishing the right path is not easy: experience is the great teacher because, as Seneca points out, ‘ we learn for life, not for school ’ (Non scholae sed vitae discimus). One way of doing this is to listen attentively to what comes out of our mouths and how this can defile us: “ Listen and understand! It is not what goes into the mou...

Despite our denials, we presume that our ‘ witnessing-to ’ has an impact, blinding us as to how ‘ witnessing-from ’ others surpasses our presumptions of being better. One reason for this failure is an inability to appreciate how the least considered person often deepens our faith not by what they say, but by what they do. The reason to ignore this richness concerns an inability to be still and notice, amidst the surrounding confusion, the kingdom’s mysterious workings. Hence, the Magister’s insight regarding the widow opens unperceived paths if we care to listen: “ Jesus sat down opposite the place where the offerings were put and watched the crowd putting their money into the temple treasury. Many rich people threw in large amounts. But a poor widow came and put in two very small copper coins, worth only a few cents. Calling his disciples to him, Jesus said, ‘Truly I tell you, this poor widow has put more into the treasury than all the others. They all gave out of their wealth; but sh...

This time of year is characterised by an invitation to be compassionate and dig into our pockets. This call to think of others is desirable, but it raises questions about how to interpret it, enlightened by the Magister, rather than social activism.  Understanding his empathy, it is insightful that when the Magister speaks of the sinful woman’s search for forgiveness, he stresses her love: “ Therefore I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven – as her great love has shown ”(Luke 7,47a). Considering the nature of my search, I find this affirmation disturbing since he continues: “ But whoever has forgiven little loves little ” (Luke 7,47b). Yes, “ Acta non verba ”; it is better to do well than to speak well!  Describing her love, the evangelist uses ‘ egapesen ’ (she loved), emphasised by ‘ polu ’ (much): her loving was a ‘ committed love , greatly so’. This should serve me as an eye-opener to what it means ‘ to repent ’ (Metanoia), which we often associate with doing less (s...

 Advent is upon us:  a threshold recalling us to Bethlehem, hard to fathom as parties, shopping and benevolence dominate. Nevertheless, it offers us the opportunity to renew our faith, which involves rethinking our traditions, especially our Christmas crib, increasingly replaced by decorations that ignore this season’s worthiness, which intends to awaken us to a hope rooted in faith.  This hope underlined by the enactment of the Christmas crib at Greccio , which was not a romanticised version of Bethlehem: it offered those present an opportunity to understand the manger as preparatory to comprehending the cross, itself fundamental to being childlike. We are, therefore, invited to grasp the significance of Paul’s affirmation: “ In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus, who being in the very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being...

Responsibility proposes availability underlined by open-heartedness, embellished by the Spirit. It envisages an otherness that seeks to understand things differently, not due to ideological persuasions but a means to deepen one’s baptism. It is thus interesting to note how the Magister emphasises his otherness as a means to greater insights still evolving: “ I have many more things to say to you, but you cannot bear them now…he will guide you into all the truth …”(John 16,12-15). Seasoned discipleship points the way if one intends to understand the Magister’s promise, but self-centred conviction is not a guarantee of enriching insights into discipleship.   This nominated otherness is not mere intellectual affirmations or lived-out spiritual haughtiness. Its significance can be best understood in the silence that underlines intimate prayer: a consciousness expressive of Isaiah’s “ Here am I, here am I ” (61,5). Since a disciple is not greater than his teacher (Matthew 10,24), t...

To judge others is qualified by distinguishing between judging others and the need to recognise others for who they are: the latter is positive because it provides us with the clearness of mind to avoid delusions. Recognising the depravity encountered in others offers us an opportunity not to ignore our unrighteousness, “ for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God ” (Romans 3,23). This recognition entails a process, which integrates the formation of our conscience; hence, the need to let the Magister illumine our hearts and minds to avoid delusions (John 8,12). We, therefore, need to listen carefully as doers of the word and not merely hearers who deceive themselves (James 1,22) because “ I am sending you out like sheep among wolves; so be wise as serpents, and innocent as doves ” (Matthew 10,16).  The formation of conscience requires that we have no self-serving agendas that obscure the truth. These venal motivations impair truth because, self-absorbed in our subjectiv...

“ We few, we happy few, we band of brothers ” concerns the rousing Saint Crispin’s Day Speech given by the King in Shakespeare’s Henry V. Exhorting his men to greater valour, the speech enhances the victory against the French at Agincourt. Applied, it enhances a better understanding when we speak of a shared discipleship as we realise that, despite the claims, few intend to actualise them. Crucially, this failure enhances the illusion of knowing yourself and, consequently, judging others.   Fellowship requests an inner equilibrium capable of eliminating the fear of the other: to recognise in the other, the other half of myself, for as we are told, “ Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another ” (Proverbs 27,17). This understanding gives way to deeper insights: “ But if we walk in the light, as he is the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his son, cleanses us from all sin ” (1John 1,7).  These insights help us redefine our understanding...

Hopkins, of whom I can never tire because he often says what I want to say but cannot, sets the mood. Personal boundaries protect the inner core of one’s identity: a sustained insight that underlines our inter-relationships. This essential inner core, expressive of values and personal dignity, must be intact as inter-relations are transformed or surpassed (Brett Beasley, Acting Christ: The Christocentric Exemplarism of Gerald Manley Hopkins , Literature and Theology, Vol. 34, Issue 2, June 2020, pp. 228-244). No one bestows nor should anyone plunder this inner core: it is proper to each person.   It is easily forgotten that dignity is a shared value, not an exclusive possession: honouring personal boundaries also means respecting the boundaries of others. Accordingly, personal formation is identified with wholeness, which includes emotional stability and clear-mindedness. Lacking this understanding, we mimic Lear’s blindness to Goneril’s and Regan’s meaningless flattery and Cordeli...

 Encountering the Magister’s face, now mirrored in other faces, challenges us to re-assess our self-understanding as we proclaim His presence. When we are unwilling to renew our faith “ from top to bottom ” (a capite ad calcem), an unnoticed dichotomy between our affirmations and practice accompanies. Somehow, it does not worry us: confined to an ornate subjectivity, we convince ourselves otherwise by wearing particular garbs or evoking particular devotions, overlooking our perfidies. Some claim innocence seeking truth, but “ light, seeking light, doth light of light beguile; so ere you find where light in darkness lies, your light grows dark by losing of your eyes ” (William Shakespeare, Love’s Labor’s Lost , I.1).  Carefulness is required, because blinded, our subjectivity dressed up as objectivity is confined by prejudices, self-gratifications and claims whose purpose is our comforts, not our discipleship. Despite claims to being Minorem, our choices speak otherwise because...